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哇,謝謝,美好的一天。
今天-我-我想我該向一些曾經站上這座講台的傑出演講者致謝:比爾‧柯林頓、歐巴馬、馬德琳‧歐布萊特(美國前國務卿)、Stephen Colbert;他們累積的聲望終於使這座講台配得上-(笑聲)(掌聲)這位演出《醉後大丈夫》的傢伙。(笑聲)(掌聲)
哈囉,諾克斯學院!感謝校方給予我這份殊榮。媽,我現在是博士了。(笑聲)(掌聲)妳甚至不用付學費(笑聲),我也不用付助學貸款,棒極了。
感謝各位同學、全體教職員、各位家長,和不知我是何方神聖的年長朋友們(笑聲)。十分榮幸能在數百名全國最聰明的年輕人面前演講,他們全都忙著更新Twitter貼文:# 謙虛。(笑聲)
我對各位有份特殊的親切感。身為俄亥俄州鄉間的歐伯林學院畢業生,我對中西部小學校的情況略有所知。他們以某種方式,將美國核心地帶的價值觀-勤奮、毅力和決心,融合了熱烈的求知慾、積極的性格和對知識的渴求。當然,還有糟糕的球隊和令人尷尬的吉祥物。(笑聲)(掌聲)
草原之火?沒搞錯吧?(尖叫聲)(掌聲)十分有趣。我只是認為,如果由我選擇球隊名稱,我會先考慮動物-「公牛」、「美洲豹」之類的,然後才考慮自然災害(笑聲)。絕無冒犯之意。「草原之火」聽起來較像史坦貝克的小說,而非隊名;甚至不是很好的史坦貝克小說。你們需要的是令對手恐懼的隊名,不是令土撥鼠恐懼的隊名(笑聲)。明白嗎?就像這個:諾克斯土撥鼠!這比「草原之火」好多了。
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以下為系統擷取之英文原文
Hello Knox College!
Thank you students, faculty, parents, and elderly relatives who have no idea who I am.
It is such an honor to be in the presence of hundreds of the sharpest young minds in the country -- all simultaneously updating their Twitter. Hashtag -- Humbled.
I feel a special kinship with all of you. As a graduate of Oberlin College in rural Ohio, I know a thing or two about small Midwestern schools. They somehow mix heartland American values of hard work, grit and determination with a burning curiosity, a progressive disposition and a genuine thirst for knowledge. And of course, terrible sports teams with totally embarrassing mascots.
The Prairie Fires? Seriously?
It's interesting. I just feel like if it was up to me to choose a team name I would probably start with animals -- your "bulls," your "jaguars" -- and then move on to natural disasters. With all due respect, "The Prairie Fires" sounds more like a Steinbeck novel than a team name. And honestly, not even a good Steinbeck novel. You need something that strikes fear into the hearts of the opposing team, not something that strikes fear into groundhogs. See? Right there: The Knox Groundhogs! That would be a way better mascot!
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因此你們都想知道今後的人生發展,讓我以這句話作為開場白:你們將安然度過一切。我怎麼知道?好,以社會新鮮人而言,你們看起來相當稱頭(笑聲)。但你們也剛完成傑出的文科教育,這是建設性及有意義的生活基礎。擁有如此廣博的知識,你們都將找到適合自己的工作。也就是說,如果你主修古典文學,你得自行負責(笑聲)。我們將在今後的就業博覽會上看見你和你悲劇性的半身像。(笑聲)
當我受邀為諾克斯學院2013年畢業生演講時,我得承認:我不確定自己是否是你們心目中適合提供建言的人選。如果你們考慮這一點:我最著名的角色是做出糟糕決定,然後忘得一乾二淨的傢伙。(笑聲)
因此我既緊張又害怕。這並非任何身體形式的恐懼;我十分確定自己能赤手空拳打倒在座任何人。如果不能,我的高聲尖叫肯定能使你們癱倒在地。相反地,我只是害怕搞砸這場演講。我該談什麼?但後來我意識到,這正是我必須和你們分享的東西。我的親身體驗,也是最有價值、能使你們終生受益的經歷之一,事實上,正是恐懼。
沒錯,我今天打算告訴各位:「恐懼是件好事。」
也許你們現在正感到恐懼。恐懼自己找不到工作、恐懼自己找不到真愛、或恐懼畢業演講嘉賓的禮袍下一絲不掛(笑聲)。全都是合理的恐懼。(笑聲)
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So you're all wondering where to go from here and how your lives are going to turn out. Well, let me start by saying, you're all going to be fine. How do I know this?
Well, for starters you're all incredibly good-looking. But you have also just completed a phenomenal liberal arts education, which is the foundation of a constructive and meaningful life. With such a broad spectrum of knowledge, you're all infinitely employable. That said, if you majored in Classics, that one's on you. We'll be seeing you and your bust of Euripides at job fairs for years to come.
When I was first asked to speak to the Knox Class of 2013, I must admit: I didn't know if I was the guy you wanted giving advice. If you think about it: I'm best known for playing a character who makes nothing but bad decisions -- and then doesn't even remember them.
So I got nervous. I got scared.
It wasn't a physical fear of any kind. I'm pretty sure I could take any of you in a fist fight. And if not, my high-pitched screaming would surely paralyze you.
Rather, I was simply scared of screwing this up. What was I going to talk about?
But then it occurred to me, this is exactly what I DO have to share with you. My firsthand knowledge that one of the most valuable and life-informing things you can experience is, in fact, fear.
That's right, I'm here to tell you today that "Fear is good."
Maybe you feel fear right now -- fear that you won't land a job, fear that you won't find love, or fear that your Commencement speaker is completely nude under his robe. All very valid fears.
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但欲瞭解為何恐懼是件好事,必須不再將恐懼視為一種感受、情緒或行為指令,而將它視為一種訊息。
恐懼是件好事,因為這是大腦判斷我們不解之事的方式。明白這一點後,我們不該將恐懼視為逃避令我們害怕之事的理由,而該將其視為接觸這些事物的理由。
別誤會我的意思,我並非鼓勵你們接觸可能危及人身安全的事物,例如火源或灰熊。順帶一提,這讓我想到十分重要的一點:你們應該遠離火源、在灰熊面前裝死,千萬別搞混了(笑聲)。這非常重要;如果你遇見著火的灰熊,請溫柔地提醒牠停下、臥倒、翻滾;如果奏效,灰熊保住一命,你當然得立刻裝死。(笑聲)
總之,對已知將危及人身安全之事產生恐懼是理所當然的,不需質疑或多慮。但另一種恐懼,對未知的恐懼,因莫名理由而裹足不前的恐懼,當你感到那種恐懼時,不妨讓它成為好奇心的引線。謝謝。(笑聲)
當我8歲時,第一次觀賞《週六夜現場》,立刻深受吸引。我不懂節目的笑點,但無所謂,我只是喜愛其中的活力,我想成為其中的一份子。隨著年齡漸長,我的癡迷與日俱增,因此當我終於大學畢業時,我做了任何有抱負的喜劇演員都會做的事:我搬到紐約市,成了-影片剪輯助理?這跟喜劇沾不上邊。但我將這種情況合理化:「我需要賺錢謀生,這份工作使我得以學習電影製作,使我得以接觸相關設備,這樣就有機會自行製作喜劇電影。」
我說服自己接受這個想法,努力工作。不妨告訴各位,我表現得十分出色;我成了紐約一家頂級後製公司的助理編輯。我確實成了這個領域的重量級專家,我從工作中得到許多創作上的滿足。我們跟性感的廣告業主管共同製作超級盃廣告,就像1990年代的《廣告狂人》,只是我們暢飲的不是蘇格蘭威士忌,而是水晶百事可樂(笑聲)。別批評,那是另一個時代。
然後我老闆說:「Helms!太棒了,我們自立門戶吧!」什麼?我當時才25歲,太不可思議了!我將成為資深剪輯師,擁有自己的助理,我的收入將增加數倍,「後製大師」的企業家之路就在我眼前!但為何我感到忐忑不安?
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But to understand why fear is good, one has to stop viewing fear as a feeling, emotion or behavioral command, and start looking at it simply as information. Fear is good because it is our brain's way of identifying the things about which we are ignorant. Knowing this, we should look at our fear not as a reason to avoid the things that frighten us, but as a reason to engage them.
Now don't get me wrong: I'm not telling you to seek out things that are life-endangering, like fires or grizzly bears. Which, by the way, brings me to a very important point: you're supposed to run from a fire and play dead with a grizzly bear. Do not mix those up. Very important. And if you ever see a grizzly bear that's on fire, gently remind him to stop, drop, and roll. And if that works, and the bear is still alive, then you should, of course, immediately play dead.
All of that is to say, that fear of known physical danger is obviously warranted and needn't be questioned or overthought. But that other kind of fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear that shuts down action without any real explanation. When you feel that fear, let it be a trigger for curiosity.
When I was 8 years old, I watched Saturday Night Live for the first time. It blew me away. I didn't understand the jokes, but it didn't matter, I loved the energy. I just wanted to be a part of it. And as I grew older, my obsession became stronger. So when I finally graduated from college, I did what any aspiring comic would do: I moved to New York City, and I.... took a job as an assistant film editor?
This was not comedy, but I rationalized it. "I need to make money. It will teach me about filmmaking, it will give me access to equipment so I can make my comedy films." I made myself believe those things and I worked hard. And let me tell you, I was good at it. I became an assistant editor at the top post-production company in New York, I was truly a go-to expert in the field, and I was getting a lot of creative satisfaction from it. We were working on Super Bowl commercials with sexy ad executives, it was like Mad Men in the 1990s -- only instead of Jack Daniels, we were guzzling Crystal Pepsi. Don't judge, it was a different era.
And then my boss said -- HELMS! This is going great -- let's start our own company! What? I'm 25 years old -- this is amazing. I'll become a full-blown editor with my own assistant; my income will jump by orders of magnitude. My entrepreneurial career as a post-production mogul was laid out before me!
So why did I have a pit in my stomach?
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歸根究柢,我的忐忑來自內心深處揮之不去的恐懼。但我恐懼什麼?因此我正視自己的恐懼,問道:「這是怎麼回事?你為何出現?」恐懼回答:「別擔心!你做得很棒!」但我再三尋問,最後恐懼聳聳肩說:「我的存在是因為你害怕喜劇事業的失敗。順帶一提,當初你搬到紐約就是為了參與喜劇事業!」一語驚醒夢中人。深入探索自己的恐懼,揭示了我真正想要的東西,這使我的人生道路大為改觀。
我注視著自己的恐懼說:「謝謝!」它說:「不客氣,老兄,這就是我存在的目的。」就在那時,我意識到-喔!只要你願意,恐懼足以成為通往成功人生之路的精神嚮導。
值得一提的是,成功的人生有無數定義:也許你想當總統;也許你只想做個好家長;也許你想在電影裡拔掉牙齒,娶個脫衣舞孃(醉後大丈夫的劇情)(笑聲)。這都是相當遠大的目標。
但僅捫心自問自己想要什麼十分容易,另一個更關鍵的問題則難以釐清得多,卻可能使你豁然開朗。那就是:我恐懼什麼?
因此我一頭栽進紐約喜劇界這個「鯊魚池」。當你開始從事喜劇演出時,最初登台的幾次,你戰力超群。你擅長這件事,主要是因為腎上腺素衝上腦門,而你做了充分準備;然後你第一次搞砸。
這十分殘酷,大家都說:「別在意,你只需要堅持下去。」我認為這正是許多喜劇演員就此放棄的原因。因為你無法不在意,當你在深愛之事上一敗塗地時。這不像沾在體外的灰塵或蛋黃醬,而是存在於體內、存在於細胞中的恐懼,因此我再次面臨真正的恐懼。
因為為了追尋這條道路,我做了一些人生中的重大改變,但我已學會深入探索。因此我求助於我的恐懼,問道:「好,說吧,這是怎麼回事?」我的恐懼說:「昨晚你在舞臺上出醜,十分丟臉,我的出現當然是為了指責你,勸你別重返舞臺,你的表演一點也不有趣。」這使我開始思考另一個問題:「如果我執意重返舞臺呢?」恐懼顯得不太自在,因為它藐視真相。最後它終於開口:「好吧,你依然存在,對嗎?即使再次出醜,你依然存在。其中尚有一線生機,如果你不曾費心找我聊這件事,永遠不會知道。觀眾的反應雖然無情,卻是真正有用的資訊。他們開懷大笑時當然很棒,但他們不笑時更有價值。為何前兩晚奏效的笑話,今晚卻失效了?」
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Turns out that pit in my stomach was deep, abiding fear. But what was I afraid of? So I looked directly at my fear and said "What's going on? Why are you here?" And fear said, "Don't worry about it! You're doing great!" But I really grilled him and finally my fear shrugged his shoulders and said, "I'm here because you're afraid of failing at comedy. Which, might I remind you, is the entire reason you moved to New York City in the first place."
And it hit me like a rock. Looking deeper into my fear revealed something I truly wanted. And that precipitated a major course correction in my life. And I looked at all of that fear and I said, "Thank you!" And it said, "No problem, man. That's what I'm here for." And that's when I realized -- wow! If you let it, fear can become a kind of spirit guide on your path to a successful life.
It's worth pointing out here that there are infinite definitions for a successful life. Maybe you want to be the president, maybe you want be a great parent, or maybe you want to pretend to rip your tooth out and marry a stripper in a movie. All equally noble choices.
But simply asking ourselves what we want is easy. Another far more powerful question that can be much harder to explore, but has the potential to bring you breathtaking clarity, is simply: What do I fear?
So I took the plunge and dove headlong into the shark tank of New York City comedy. When you start doing standup, the first couple of times you go onstage, you kill. You're great at it, mainly because adrenaline is screaming through your brain AND you're over-prepared. And then you bomb for the first time. And it's brutal. And everyone says, "Shake it off, you just need to keep at it." And this is where I think a lot of comedians just throw in the towel.
Because you can't shake it off. When you fail at the thing you love, it isn't on the outside of you like dirt or spilled mayonnaise -- it's inside of you. It's in your molecules.
And so I was scared again. Really scared, because I'd made some big life changes to accommodate this path. But I had learned to dig a little deeper so I turned to my fear and I said, "Alright, start talking, what's going on here?" And my fear said, "Last night on stage, you tanked. And it was humiliating. So naturally I'm here to nag you and tell you not to get back on that stage." And that led me to another more deliberate question "What will happen if I do get back up there?" And fear squirmed a little, because fear despises truth, but he finally cracked and said, "Well, you're still here, right? And even if you tank again ...you'll still be here again. And here's a little silver lining that you wouldn't know if you hadn't bothered to talk to me about this. That crowd reaction, albeit brutal, is really useful data. When they laughed it was nice, but when they didn't it was even more valuable. Why did that one joke work two nights ago and bomb tonight?"
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就像之前一樣,恐懼確實幫了大忙。我有每場表演的錄音,我害怕聆聽,但還是聽了。我聽見掌握時機時最細微的變化;我聽見現場的喧囂改變了表演的能量;我聽見無數細節。我進行調整,情況有所改觀;大幅改觀。如果不曾失敗,如果恐懼不曾指出我需要關注的重點,我永遠不會進步。
好,顯然恐懼無法說話。感謝上帝,因為在我的想像中,它的聲音十分恐怖,就像《奪魂鋸》的主角。但我將恐懼擬人化,以便說明一個觀點,那就是:如果你和恐懼建立正確的關係,它將告訴你許多激勵人心的事,不僅是使你恐懼的事。如果我們的祖先不曾感到恐懼,或許整個人類物種早就滅於猛獁腳下。但如果他們不曾審視自己的恐懼,將不會有美味的猛獁漢堡。(笑聲)
因此成功來自恐懼與探索之間的張力。這種張力總是存在,但只要探索的欲望勝於不想搞砸的欲望,你就在正確的道路上前進。相較於以不搞砸為導向的生活,以探索為導向的生活值得多了。
因此別害怕恐懼,因為它將磨練你、挑戰你、使你更強。當你逃避恐懼時,也失去造就最佳自我的機會。因此今天,正視自身的恐懼,並藉此詢問自己,我意識到某些自己一開始就該明白的事:沒有任何年紀稍長、盛名遠播、穿著不合身禮袍站在講臺上的人,能確實告訴你們今後該明白的事。事實上,終此一生,恐懼的真相只有親身體驗才能真正瞭解。
因此,身體力行、跳脫恐懼、自在生活;坦然面對挫折,放下其中一些,相信自己能找出答案。
相信你的直覺、相信你的熱情、相信你的同理心、相信你的愛,並相信,即使恐懼本身都想停下、臥倒和翻滾,當遇上「諾克斯草原之火」無法阻擋的熱情與力量時。(笑聲)
十分感謝,恭喜各位。(歡呼聲)(掌聲)
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And just as before, fear actually helped me out. I had recordings of those standup sets and I was terrified to listen to them, but I did it and I heard the subtlest variations in my timing, I heard noise in the room that changed the energy, I heard details. And I made adjustments. And I got better. Much better. And I never would have if I hadn't bombed, and if fear wasn't there to point out exactly where I needed to focus.
Now, obviously fear can't talk, and thank god because I imagine it would have a horrifying voice like the guy from Saw, but I've anthropomorphized fear to make a point. Which is that if you strike the right relationship with your fear, it can tell you a lot of really exciting things besides simply just what to be afraid of.
If our ancestors didn't feel fear, the whole species probably would have been trampled by mammoths a long time ago. But if they never examined their fears -- no delicious mammoth-burgers. And so, success lies in the tension between fear and discovery.
That tension will always be there, but so long as your desire to explore is greater than your desire to not screw up, you're on the right track. A life oriented toward discovery is infinitely more rewarding than a life oriented toward not blowing it.
So don't be afraid of fear. Because it sharpens you, it challenges you, it makes you stronger; and when you run away from fear, you also run away from the opportunity to be your best possible self.
And so, today, in facing my own fear squarely, and using it to interrogate myself, I realized something I should have known from the start: no slightly-older, reasonably famous man or woman standing at a podium in an ill-fitting graduation gown, can actually TELL you what you need to know upon setting out this day.
Indeed, the truth about fear, as with the rest of life, is that you'll only really figure it out by living through it. So, by god, get out there and live. Take your lumps. Dole out a few lumps. And trust you'll figure it out.
Trust your instincts, trust your passions, trust your empathy, and trust your love. And trust that even fear itself will want to stop, drop and roll when confronted with the unstoppable passion and power of a Knox Prairie Fire.
Thank you and congratulations!